A Mother Forgets To Take Her Baby Out Of A Car Seat-100 Degrees: Could There Be A Worse Hell?
Posted: Friday, May 13, 2011
by Fran Larson
http://www.franniesquotes.com/
(May13, 2011, Oprah Show: Brenda Slaby Revisits The Show. She previously appeared on June 25, 2009)
I don’t cry easily. Even a funeral or profound sadness will not bring tears, but the thought of a mother leaving her baby in a car seat and then finding her dead brings absolute devastation to me.
My mind conjures up a scene whereby I am experiencing what hell must be like as I undo the car seat and take the lifeless body in my arms. I then experience misery and guilt I have never known and my wailing sounds like an animal in distress. I want to disappear…I want to be gone…
On August 23, 2007, Brenda Slaby, a teacher was returning to school after summer vacation. The usual routine was that her husband, Gary usually brought the children to the babysitters and pre-school. However, on this day he had a dental appointment, so he asked his Brenda to take the youngest daughter, 2-year-old Cecilia to the sitters for him.
Brenda had so much on her mind. She was thinking about all the things she needed to new this new school year plus everything at home that every Mom knows is overwhelming.
Then a tragic thing happened that could happen to anyone. She forgot the baby was still in the car and drove directly to the school.
Brenda did all the usual things a teacher does when returning from the summer. She attended meetings, had lunch and still did not remember that her baby was still in the car.
How could words describe Brenda’s heart when one of the teachers ran into Brenda’s office and told her the fatal words that she would never forget? She told Brenda that her baby girl was in the car. Brenda and some of the other teachers ran to the car screaming. By that time, the child was lifeless. The baby girl, Cecilia had been in the car at least 8 hours in temperatures that rose to 100 degrees.
Brenda was never charged with a crime, nor did her husband Gary ever blame her. I am sure she has suffered more than any legal system could ever punish her. Not only did she have to live with her mistake, but also she became the most hated mother in America. Why don’t people realize it could have been them? It could happen to anyone.
On today’s show, Oprah said, “there are no accidents.”
Oprah knew that someone would be powerfully affected by that story, but she didn’t know whom.
“No one thinks something like that can ever happen to them,” Oprah warned.
Mother Finds Meaning To Tragedy
My baby can give a message to all of us to “slow down.” Brenda revealed that today she has a new career that has allowed her to slow down. She truly believes her baby
was sacrificed to teach mothers and other caregivers this lesson.
“I think my baby daughter was here for a purpose.”
Brenda tells other mothers to put something in the back seat, such as your purse, so that you could see the baby (in the car seat) if you had forgotten.
Moms and Dads are so busy these days. Mothers who work outside the home are so stressed that Brenda reminds us, “There are many ways you can “forget” your child besides being in a car seat.” We can “forget” to listen to them or “forget” to be there for them.
In 2009, when Brenda first appeared on the Oprah Show, shesent this important message to overwhelmed mother's...SLOW DOWN! Don't try to be perfect. In Brenda's own words "I've learned to say a lot, 'It just doesn't matter,'" she says. "The house doesn't matter, the perfect dinner doesn't matter—the kids matter."
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Top-level comments on this article: (2 total)Hi Fran thanks for sharing. Like you I pain when I know of harm coming to children even in accidental circumstances. Brenda's pain must have been deep at her sad loss. I can relate to how easy it is to forget things when your busy, but I'm struggling with the 8 hour period the child was not even thought of. Busy or not, if I am around kids they are never out of mind for a minute. When I am relieved of my duties of looking after Graciemae, she is still there in my thoughts 24/7.
I struggle with this because, even if I was at work my kids are constantly on my mind, hence, which would alert me. I have always been overprotective and maybe shouldn't judge others by my own standards, but isn't that what moms do.
Thank you for a well written article
Keep well
Kacy
Good story you tell here Fran, I hope many mothers read this and learn from it.
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